The line between life and death is thin...

So I have had a lot of random thoughts in my head after I heard about the death of Tahera. Firstly, Tahera is (I somehow can't bring myself to type was) a pious muslimah who I met around 2 years ago  in the afternoon quran school for women and children. She was new in town because her family had just moved here from Pakistan few months before that time. She was in the process of enrolling her kids in the American school here because her children could not speak arabic. Few months later, we met at the shopping mall and I asked her about her children's school, how they are coping in the American school, to my surprise, she told me she has pulled her kids out of the school because it does not meet the moral standards she wanted for her kids. She later took them to the Pakistani school only to pull them out after some months again for the same reasons as the american school. To solve the problem, Tahera brought the kids with her to the tafeez school I go in the morning after I stopped the afternoon classes at which we met. Most of her friends questioned her about her decision to pull  her kids out of school and take them with her to a quran school, but she calmly explained that that was her best option for now. She sends the kids, a 6th grader and a 3rd grader to her friend who does home tutoring as a business in the afternoon to be able to keep up with what they ought to learn in a regular school. This, to me, shows a level of piety not commonly found among people in this age where most of us will compromise a little deen and morality here and there for our kids to be able to get a good education. I also remember one day Tahera and another sister were having a discussion and the sister was recommending a particular TV station programme and she (Tahera) replied that her children do not watch TV because they don't have one in their home because of the ills of TV. The other sister who happens to be an Arab was shocked to even hear that there is anyone who does not have a TV set. These are some of what I can remember about Tahera. She also wears full hijab with hand gloves which is not common here. Most people wear the niqab but don't cover their hands. So when I heard that she died on the spot when the accident happened, I was really humbled and at the same time mortified about the worthlessness of the life of this world. Within a few seconds, someone's situation may change such that they would be so helpless about issues they would have thought inappropriate under normal circumstances. I mean In saudi Arabia men and women don't mix or talk. So men deal with men and women deal with women. I was just sitting here wondering how Tahera's husband must have felt when some accident emergency officials were taking his wife's lifeless body away from the accident spot and he just could not do a thing about it. Men who would not even have been able to exchange salaams with her few minutes before the accident. I am not a man but I think that must be a really hard pill to swallow for any muslim man. He and the kids were taken in a car to the nearest hospital while his wife was taken in another by men he did not know to a destination he does not know in makkah and he was unable to stop them. I really can't imagine how that must have felt. He later told friends who went to meet him at the hospital that his wife did not want to come back home after the umrah in makkah. She said she wanted to remain there. But they had to come back so that he could resume work on saturday. Even while at makkah, she did not want to return to the hotel they were staying. She insisted on sitting at the haram all night. Maa sha Allah that was somehow comforting for all of us. she spent her last hours in worship and remembrance of Allah. She had it in her will to be buried in makkah among the faithfuls. She was buried there yesterday after a janazah prayer at the haram after salaatul isha' maa sha Allah. May Allah forgive Tahera and all dead muslims.

I just lost a friend

I was down with a really bad sore throat this afternoon. I took some lemon and honey tea to alleviate it but it did not get better. I later started shivering and then my head started hurting. I was a little scared. I decided to go to my favourite home remedy site, earth clinic and found out that the most popular remedy for sore throat is cayene pepper. I tried gargling a little  but it was just too hot for me to keep it in my mouth for long. I decided to take a nap hoping to get better by maghrib. I was cold so I covered myself all up with a woolen blanket and told my eldest child to make sure no one disturbs me. As I was trying to sleep, I started thinking about death. I thought what if I sleep and do not wake up? My mind was occupied with all sorts of thought; how would the kids cope without me? how would the hb take care of them without me? how would he break the news to my family? Most importantly, I thought of what will become of me if I die. Am I serving my creator as I should? what is the assurance that my past sins have been forgiven? All these and other such thought were going on in my head. I finally drifted to sleep and was feeling a bit better when I woke up. I managed to pray salaatul magrib and waited for isha which I had to pray sitting. I made a cup of hot lemon  tea with honey and cayenne pepper and got back into bed trying to sleep again.
  Then the phone rang, it was my friend F, she asked why I sounded funny and I told her in my barely audible voice that I was sick. She said ok then, she would let me rest and we talk tommorrow. 15 minutes later, she called back, saying something happened and she felt she needed to tell me, now!. I knew it had to be important for her to call back after saying goodnight.  She said I should try to be firm about what she was about to tell me. Her hb just informed her that one of our pakistani friends died in an accident this evening on their way home from Makkah. The sister attends the same tahfeez school I go and I still saw her on tuesday. I was too shocked to talk. I mean I was just thinking of death few hours ago and now I was told my friend is dead. She wanted me to confirm from a friend who is a doctor in the hospital her hb and children were taken to. I made the call with shaky hands and the sister confirmed that it is indeed true. Her body had been taken to makkah while the husband and three kids were taken to khlais hospital for treatment. I really hope the kids are ok insha Allah. F and I decided to wait till tomorrow before calling the tafeez teacher as it is a liitle late now for such news. Inna lillah wa inna ilaihi raajohoon. May Allah forgive Tahera and accept her as one of the faithfuls and grant her Jannah. May Allah comfort her husband and children in this trying time, aamin. May Allah help us all to become better muslims and not test us with what is more than we can bear, aamin.

Diet helped me get rid of tinnitus

I have stopped using the Grape seed extract for several weeks. In fact, I only used it for for a few days, not up to 2 weeks in all. During the first few days after I stopped, I noticed I still had the ringing sometimes during the day, maybe like 10% of the time, but it was not as loud as it had always been, and it was such that I could easily ignore it, without having to mask it with the AC unit and I was always able to sleep at night without any background noise. When you have a condition that is said to have no cure, and you are trying to wrap your head round the thought of having to live with it for the rest of your life, a partial relief from the ailment no matter how little would feel like the best thing in the world. I was however not as excited as I should have been back then because I always had this nagging fear at the back of my mind that the ringing could return with full force any time, and I would be back to where I have to have a fan or AC on whenever I am in a room, no matter the weather condition. I dreaded the thought, but there was nothing I could do but pray. 

Sometime along the line, I stumbled upon the fast five diet while searching for the reviews of the warrior diet on Amazon. The warrior diet is one good diet that can be easily adopted by those who don't have the will power to try the fast 5 diet. WD allows you to eat a light BF and lunch made of fruit and veggies and then you can have a sumptous dinner. The basis of the WD is also shifting between periods of under eating and overeating. Many people have used it successfully but I found the fast five somehow easier than the WD because while fasting, it is much easier for me not to think of food. Well, it just occurred to me few days ago that the period my tinnitus stopped completely, coincides with the time I started the fast 5 diet. I have read on earthclinic some people who claimed that eating a neanderthal diet in which they only ate whole unrefined foods, the type that would have been available to the cave man during that time, cured their tinnitus but I could not bring myself to eat in that strict manner. Now that I am on the fast 5, I eat 1 main meal daily which is almost always the same dish and I snack on some nuts, or a cup of youghurt and then have a fruit before dinner time and thats it. I have not eaten rice,  bread or any junk food for many days now. The best part is that I did not even miss it. The fact that I can eat whatever I want during the 5 hour eating window makes this diet easier for me than atkins, though I would have probably lost more than this on atkins.

Anyway, I  think I will stick to the fast 5 lifestyle even after I have reached my goal weight so that hopefully, I can continue to live tinnitus free.

I lost 6 pounds in 1 month!!!

I started this not so popular diet 1 month ago, 24th of  January. I am 6 pounds lighter today. The diet is called The fast 5 diet and the fast 5 lifestyle. I have tried different types of diet but this is the easiest for me. The basic rule of the diet is to eat during 5 consecutive hours during 24 hours and to fast for the remaining 19 hours. You are allowed to drink water, unsweetened tea without milk or cream or any other zero calorie drink, Even diet soda is allowed but I avoid drinking this because I know aspartame, the most used sweetener in diet soda is said to be bad. You are allowed to eat whatever you want during the 5 hour eating window but it is recommended that you eat healthy for best results. The recommended timing for the fast 5 diet is eating between 5.p.m. and 10p.m. I shifted the timing for my convenience such that I eat between 1.p.m and 6p.m daily and spend the remaining time fasting. The expected average weight loss on this diet is 1 pound per week, which means 52 pounds in a year. The diet can be found in a book written by Bert W. Herring MD. Its sold on amazon for a price of 10 dollars but he gives the e-book for free if you go to the official website of dr. Herring. Just google fast 5 diet. 

My starting weight was 193.5 pounds.

Current weight 187.4 pounds.

Aadab(ettiquetes) of conversation

ADAAB OF CONVERSATION



ALWAYS speak the TRUTH. Never hesitate in speaking the truth even at the greatest risk.

Speak only when you must, and always talk with a PURPOSE. Too much talk and useless conversation betrays a lack of seriousness. Your are accountable before Allaah for every word you utter. The Angel of Allaah records. "A supervisor remains vigilant to preserve on record every speech that is uttered by his tongue."

Always speak POLITELY.

Wear a smile on your face and a sweet tone in your speech.

Always speak in a moderate voice. Do not keep your voice so low as to be inaudible to the addressee, nor raise it so loud that the addressee might be over-awed by your voice. Allaah affirms: "Surely! the harshest of all the voices is the voice of the ***." [31 : 19]

Do NOT spoil your tongue with dirty talk. Do NOT speak ill of others. Never indulge in backbiting. Do not complain against others. Never indulge in mimicking others to ridicule them.

Do not make false promises.

Never laugh at others, nor boast of your own superiority or indulge in self praise.

Never get unreasonable and rash in conversation. Do not pass remarks by a disgraceful name.

Avoid swearing frequently.

Always say what is JUST and FAIR regardless of any loss of yourself, your friend or relative. "And when you say something, speak what is just even if you are talking about your relative."

Be soft-spoken, REASONABLE and SYMPATHETIC in your conversation. Do not utter sharp, harsh and teasing remarks.

When women happen to talk with men, they should speak in a CLEAR, STRAIGHT, and rough manner. They ought not speak in delicate, sweet tone lest the listener should entertain any foul expectation.

If the impudent want to entangle you in dialogue or altercation offer them 'Salaam' POLITELY and LEAVE them. Those who indulge in loose talk and absurd conversation are the worst lot of the Ummah.

Keep in view the mental level and outlook of the man you are talking to so as to make him understand. If the addressee cannot hear or is unable to catch your meaning, repeat what you have said before without any resentment.

Always be BRIEF and to the point in your talk. It is unfair to prolong discussion without rhyme or reason.

When you wish to explain the tenets of Al-Islaam or want to speak on the teachings of Al-Islaam be simple and clear and speak in a passionate and HEART-WARMING style. To seek reputation through oratory, to try to impress people with flowery language, to seek popularity among people, to adopt a proud and haughty mein, or to deliver speeches only for the sake of fun and recreation --all these are the worst habits that corrupt the man to the core of his heart.

Never indulge in flattery, or ingratiate with anybody. Always mind your honour and respect and avoid anything below your dignity.

Do not interrupt and interfere in others' conversation without their permission, nor intercept others conversation in order to say something yourself. If, however, you must speak, do so with the permission of the other.

Speak slowly in a proper and DIGNIFIED manner. Do not speak in a hurried manner nor indulge in fun and jokes all the time as it degrades you in the eyes of others.

If somebody puts a question to you, listen CAREFULLY to him and make an answer after careful thought. It is simply foolish to answer the questions without due consideration. If the questions are being put to somebody else, do not be officious as to give answers yourself.

When someone is narrating something, do not say "we know already." Maybe he reveals something new and impresses you by his sincerity and piety.

When you talk to someone, give due regard to his age, status, and his relationship to you. Do not talk with your parents, teachers, and elders in a manner in which you would talk with your friends. Likewise, when you are talking to youngsters, speak with affection and elderly dignity.

While engaged in conversation, do not point out towards any one lest he should conceive any misunderstanding or suspicion. Abstain from eavesdropping on others.

Listen more and talk less. Do not reveal your secrets to others. Once you disclose a secret to someone, never expect it to remain a secret any more.

http://www.allaahuakbar.net/important_i ... sation.htm

Losing weight is now a must

I have been overweight for many years now. It started after I had my first child, around 8 years ago. I was at what is known as a healthy weight before I got married. I have never had to do anything about my weight, until that time. I ate whatever I wanted including junk food, sweets, chocolates, anything. I have never thought of exercising. I was active because I was in school and normal daily activities was just enough to keep me healthy. 

After marriage,  I moved to Saudi and got pregnant and sick. I could barely keep anything down. I lost weight in the first trimester and was really weak. I made it through the 9 months and was blessed with a healthy baby, maa sha Allah. But there was a problem. Being a food lover, I was pissed about the fact that I could not enjoy my meals for almost 9 months. My nausea and vomiting started very early, even before I realized I was pregnant. The nausea drugs given by the doctor did not work. I was told it usually subsides after the first semester but mine did not. It continued till the time of confinement. Needless to say, after delivery, I started eating like never before and I just assumed I would not gain weight due to overeating because I thought afterall, I used to eat a lot in the past and never gained weight. How wrong I was. I realized  I was getting out of shape and breastfeeding alone would not help me lose weight when my baby was around a year. I started taking steps towards healthy living and lost some pounds in a few weeks. But before I could really get back into shape, I got pregnant with my second baby. I had 2 more babies after that. When I had my 4th, my first baby was 5 and a half years old. I now weigh 193 pounds. After my last child, I decided to get serious about losing weight because by that time, I was really concerned about the health implications of being fat as well as my desire to look good for my hb. I tired so many fad diets and always lose around 10 pounds and regain it off and on. I have a problem staying on a particular diet for long time so understandably, I did not succeed while on any of them. The last I tried was Atkins but I stopped because firstly, I read something about a risk to the kidneys and then it was not so much  fun eating so many eggs, chicken, meat and veggies. I also learnt it is not safe to be in ketosis while pregnant and my system is such that I sometimes get pregnant without knowing, so I did not want to take chances. 

  I wrote in my last post about taking Grape seed extract for melasma and then being pleasantly surprised that my tinnitus stopped. I was puzzled about what could be the relationship between the supplement and tinnitus and decided to do a little research. I have good reasons to suspect that I have pulsatile tinnitus which has nothing to do with the ear but the blood vessels. I found this

"Pulsatile tinnitus is the type of ear noise that is perceived as a rhythmic pulsing that is often in time with the heartbeat. It can be experienced as a thumping or whooshing sound. It is sometimes referred to as vascular tinnitus because in the majority of cases, it is related to disturbances in the blood flow. About 3% of tinnitus patients experience this type of tinnitus. 

Pulsatile tinnitus usually originates within the blood vessels inside the head or neck region when disturbed blood flow occurs. This results from either increased blood flow or a narrowing of the opening of the blood vessel, both of which result in turbulent blood flow that can be heard in the ear."

I feel this explains why taking GSE for just 2 days could relieve my tinnitus. GSE is known to help blood circulation. This also explains why I had low blood pressure.  It was stated in the site, (www.tinnutusformula.com) I found this from that there could be an underlying cause and in rare cases, it could lead to a stroke. I made further search and found that pulsatile tinnitus is more common in young women who are overweight and that losing weight most of the time is enough to take the problem away, completely. I will make an appointment with the ENT again and this time around, I will insist he carries out the necessary tests and discuss with him what I have found out about my tinnitus to be able to help him in helping me. The problem with tinnitus is being able to find out the cause so as to know how to treat it. Now that I believe I have an Idea about the cause, it should be easy for the doctor to understand what the overall problem is and what to do about it. But before I see the doctor, I have made up my mind to have a turnaround today and start eating right and living healthy.

Saying bye to tinnitus

Hello dear blog. Here I am again writing after a period of break. I had been busy with school and kids so I could not write most of what I needed to. 

Well, I have never mentioned on this blog that I have tinnitus; an annoying ringing of the ears which is only best understood by anyone who has had it. It started 5 years ago, when I was pregnant with my 3rd baby. I did not know what it was and did not do anything about it for some months. Then I thought of making a search on the net only to find out there is a name for it and that many people suffer from the condition. The worst news is that it is said to not have a cure and that poeple just have to learn to live with it. I went to some home remedy sites and found some suggested remedies which did not work. I made an appointment with an ENT even though most people say ENTs have no clue about how to treat it. Well, the look on the doctor's face was very depressing as he gave me some drugs to take for 2 months and then return to him. It was as if he knew the drug is not likely to help. It happened that I was nursing my baby at that time and he was just 4 months old so i decided to search online as I always do before taking any medication. It was said that the drug is not safe while nursing or pregnant. I went back to the doctor days later and he assured me that there is no problem and that I can take it. I searched again  and some people said the med- called Vastarel can actually cause ear ringing. Knowing how debilitating the tinnitus can be, I was afraid that taking the drug while nursing has a risk of my baby developing tinnitus in future, and I do not even wish this ringing on an enemy, I decided not to take chances, so I did not take the medicine. I kept trying to cope with it. I tried masking the noise with the AC or the kitchen exhaust fan. Most of the time don't remember I have tinnitus as long as there is an AC or a fan on but the problem starts when I go to other people's houses and they don't want the AC on because their kids have a cold. I have to block my left hear with my palm just to stop hearing the noise. At times my ear hurts and I just try to live with it.

Recently, I found out that the reason a small scar on my body gets darker each time I try to lighten it is because I have melasma. I went to see a dermatologist who gave me some bleaching creams that contain 4% hydroquinone. I used it for some weeks and did not notice a difference. I used some other rermedies like castor oil, baking soda, shea butter but the scar did not lighten. Later a friend gave me a cream that worked to lighten the spot. I was happy to have found something that works at last. I use sunscreen on it so that it does not darken again but to my surprise it became even darker than it was before the cream in only a week. So I resolved to never use anything on it again. I went to my dear site www.earthclinic.com for advice. Most people there who have had success with getting rid of their melasma said they treated it from the inside. I decided to go that route. The 2 most recommended supplemnts were Grape seed extract and grapefruit seed extract. I could not find the latter where I live so I decided to give Grape seed extract a shot to see if it would work. I bought a bottle from GNC and started taking 500mg a day just 3 days ago. And the first thing I noticed is that my ear ringing stopped!!!. Anyone who has never had tinnitus would not know what it means to be able to sit in a quiet room without hearing some ringing sound from inside your own head. Yesterday was the first time I slept throughout the night without the help of noise from an AC or a fan. I really could not believe it. I was trying to treat melasma with GSE but it took away my tinnitus. I really pray this lasts forever! I am doing more research on GSE to understand the correlation. I read on dr Lam's (www.drlam.com) site that it should be taken for 12 weeks to treat some other condition. I don't know if it can be taken long term, but if it is safe, I would be ready to take it for the rest of my life. Also, I would share my experience on as many websites as possible to help other tinnitus sufferers. It is disheartening to see how many people are being scammed by the numerous online books that claim to cure or treat tinnitus. I always search for the reviews by independent sites and always find that it is a scam. If you read about this and know anyone that has tinnitus, please advice them to try GSE, who knows, it may just be what they need to have silence in their heads again.