The line between life and death is thin...

So I have had a lot of random thoughts in my head after I heard about the death of Tahera. Firstly, Tahera is (I somehow can't bring myself to type was) a pious muslimah who I met around 2 years ago  in the afternoon quran school for women and children. She was new in town because her family had just moved here from Pakistan few months before that time. She was in the process of enrolling her kids in the American school here because her children could not speak arabic. Few months later, we met at the shopping mall and I asked her about her children's school, how they are coping in the American school, to my surprise, she told me she has pulled her kids out of the school because it does not meet the moral standards she wanted for her kids. She later took them to the Pakistani school only to pull them out after some months again for the same reasons as the american school. To solve the problem, Tahera brought the kids with her to the tafeez school I go in the morning after I stopped the afternoon classes at which we met. Most of her friends questioned her about her decision to pull  her kids out of school and take them with her to a quran school, but she calmly explained that that was her best option for now. She sends the kids, a 6th grader and a 3rd grader to her friend who does home tutoring as a business in the afternoon to be able to keep up with what they ought to learn in a regular school. This, to me, shows a level of piety not commonly found among people in this age where most of us will compromise a little deen and morality here and there for our kids to be able to get a good education. I also remember one day Tahera and another sister were having a discussion and the sister was recommending a particular TV station programme and she (Tahera) replied that her children do not watch TV because they don't have one in their home because of the ills of TV. The other sister who happens to be an Arab was shocked to even hear that there is anyone who does not have a TV set. These are some of what I can remember about Tahera. She also wears full hijab with hand gloves which is not common here. Most people wear the niqab but don't cover their hands. So when I heard that she died on the spot when the accident happened, I was really humbled and at the same time mortified about the worthlessness of the life of this world. Within a few seconds, someone's situation may change such that they would be so helpless about issues they would have thought inappropriate under normal circumstances. I mean In saudi Arabia men and women don't mix or talk. So men deal with men and women deal with women. I was just sitting here wondering how Tahera's husband must have felt when some accident emergency officials were taking his wife's lifeless body away from the accident spot and he just could not do a thing about it. Men who would not even have been able to exchange salaams with her few minutes before the accident. I am not a man but I think that must be a really hard pill to swallow for any muslim man. He and the kids were taken in a car to the nearest hospital while his wife was taken in another by men he did not know to a destination he does not know in makkah and he was unable to stop them. I really can't imagine how that must have felt. He later told friends who went to meet him at the hospital that his wife did not want to come back home after the umrah in makkah. She said she wanted to remain there. But they had to come back so that he could resume work on saturday. Even while at makkah, she did not want to return to the hotel they were staying. She insisted on sitting at the haram all night. Maa sha Allah that was somehow comforting for all of us. she spent her last hours in worship and remembrance of Allah. She had it in her will to be buried in makkah among the faithfuls. She was buried there yesterday after a janazah prayer at the haram after salaatul isha' maa sha Allah. May Allah forgive Tahera and all dead muslims.

I just lost a friend

I was down with a really bad sore throat this afternoon. I took some lemon and honey tea to alleviate it but it did not get better. I later started shivering and then my head started hurting. I was a little scared. I decided to go to my favourite home remedy site, earth clinic and found out that the most popular remedy for sore throat is cayene pepper. I tried gargling a little  but it was just too hot for me to keep it in my mouth for long. I decided to take a nap hoping to get better by maghrib. I was cold so I covered myself all up with a woolen blanket and told my eldest child to make sure no one disturbs me. As I was trying to sleep, I started thinking about death. I thought what if I sleep and do not wake up? My mind was occupied with all sorts of thought; how would the kids cope without me? how would the hb take care of them without me? how would he break the news to my family? Most importantly, I thought of what will become of me if I die. Am I serving my creator as I should? what is the assurance that my past sins have been forgiven? All these and other such thought were going on in my head. I finally drifted to sleep and was feeling a bit better when I woke up. I managed to pray salaatul magrib and waited for isha which I had to pray sitting. I made a cup of hot lemon  tea with honey and cayenne pepper and got back into bed trying to sleep again.
  Then the phone rang, it was my friend F, she asked why I sounded funny and I told her in my barely audible voice that I was sick. She said ok then, she would let me rest and we talk tommorrow. 15 minutes later, she called back, saying something happened and she felt she needed to tell me, now!. I knew it had to be important for her to call back after saying goodnight.  She said I should try to be firm about what she was about to tell me. Her hb just informed her that one of our pakistani friends died in an accident this evening on their way home from Makkah. The sister attends the same tahfeez school I go and I still saw her on tuesday. I was too shocked to talk. I mean I was just thinking of death few hours ago and now I was told my friend is dead. She wanted me to confirm from a friend who is a doctor in the hospital her hb and children were taken to. I made the call with shaky hands and the sister confirmed that it is indeed true. Her body had been taken to makkah while the husband and three kids were taken to khlais hospital for treatment. I really hope the kids are ok insha Allah. F and I decided to wait till tomorrow before calling the tafeez teacher as it is a liitle late now for such news. Inna lillah wa inna ilaihi raajohoon. May Allah forgive Tahera and accept her as one of the faithfuls and grant her Jannah. May Allah comfort her husband and children in this trying time, aamin. May Allah help us all to become better muslims and not test us with what is more than we can bear, aamin.

pictures of masjid haram