RaNdOm thoughts

I have been busy with kids and tahfeez school for weeks so I have not been able to write in my blog. I am done with exams now and the kids started their summer break so I can steal a few minutes here and there to write. I wish the summer can be spent relaxing and having lots of fun and traveling to see our family members, but its not going to be that way. My kids go to the Government schools which uses the Arabic curriculum and arabic as a medium of teaching every subject. We are from an English speaking country so I have to homeschool my children in English language especially during the summer so that they can cope in a regular English speaking school if and when we return home. This would not have been an issue if we were certain we would be here as long as we want, but KSA does not usually grant citizenship to expats no matter how long  ere but their status is like that of any other person born anywhere else. They don't have any special privilege as a result of being born here. If may Allah forbid, we become jobless, we all have to leave. So, teaching them in English using the American curriculum becomes imperative so that we have a back up plan in case of the unexpected. It will be nice staying here forever but there is really no true Hijrah to KSA since You cant determine how long you remain there and everything at the end is in Allah's hands.

 What I wrote in my last post about a man remarrying soon after his wife passes away was in no way meant to criticize the man in question. I can't even imagine what he must be going through. He is all alone now and the kids are still in their country because he cant care for them properly on his own and he has to go to work so they will have to be left alone at home for many hours in a day which is not a good thing. 

  The only thing I personally felt even though it should not be any of my business is that it was a little too soon. But hey I cant even blame my late friends hb since it was her own mum that offered her sister to him in marriage. The mum might have reasoned he would end up marrying some woman one day sooner or later anyways so why not tell him to marry her daughter so that she would not lose him as a son-in-law  and risk her grandkids being maltreated by a total stranger that he is likely to marry. I guess the way women think is completely different from the way men think. Thankful slave mentioned that it usually happens the other way round as well. Yes. I have seen it before even in my own culture. In fact this is more common than the husband marrying his late wife's sister and it is seen as acceptable. But I notice a woman usually feels reluctant to remarry after her husband dies and if they do, it takes a longer time before they can really make themselves do it. The sister Thankful slave mentioned that married her B-I-L after her hb passed away most likely did not marry him the day after her iddah ended right? even though that would have been halal.One of our friends was not at all surprised when she heard our late friends hb was remarrying. She said she had a neighbour back home who married his late wife's sister a week after she passed away. Meanwhile a friend of mine whom I wrote about on this same blog who lost her husband january last year still puts me off each time I pray for her that she would be blessed by another husband who will help her to raise her young kids. She tells me she does not need a husband; she needs to give her all to her kids. Of course I think she may eventually change her mind one day and decide to remarry, but hmmmm...what I have concluded in my little mind is..................................................................

Men, no matter what they think or how macho they think they are and see themselves as being superior to woman, Despite the fact that  many do not respect women or even realize how important women are, are more in need of women than they will ever be able to accept and affirm, women also need men but men need women more than women need men. I have heard many women say they will not remarry if their husband dies before them whereas men are in fact fantasizing having another woman or other women even when their wife is beside them. I know most people will not agree with this but these are my RaNdOm thoughts for today.

 

Seven years in saudi Arabia, still learning arabic!

I moved to saudi Arabia with my hb in the month of february, 2003, exactly 7 years ago. I had such high hopes and aspirations about my life here, my religion, better living condition as I was coming from a third world country and most of all, how I would soon start to speak arabic and read books written in arabic that I had always wished to read.

Shortly after I got here, I started getting sick and was told by everyone including the doctor that it was just the flu due to a change of environment. I was given some medication and injection which did very little to make me get better and I had to go back to the clinic to see another doctor who is a gynea. I told her the symptoms I was having and she told me I was pregnant, before even having me take a pregnancy test. That was how I started my journey into motherhood with my beloved son who is now 6 years old, maasha Allah, and all praise belongs to Allah.

Well, from that period till now, I've been either pregnant or breastfeeding or combining both, alhamdulillah, and I now have 4 children, maa sha Allah, and may Allah protect them and all muslim children, aamin. In short, before I knew it, my plans and wishes to attend a school in which i can learn arabic language was put in the back burner for a long time. I started going for classes for the first time only 2 years ago, when my 3rd baby was around 6 months old, but i had to stop a year a later because i was almost due to have my 4th, maa sha Allah. The result of all these is that, after 7 years in saudi arabia, I still cannot hold a conversation in arabic, it is a sad realization for me that I'm still struggling with the language despite being surrounded by Arabs. I joined a tahfeez school for women and children 3 months ago, with the hope of learning arabic by listening in the tajweed classes and probably by interaction with other sisters as most people there could not speak english, so hopefully, I would be forced to speak after some time.
I also decided to be more serious about my self study sessions by reading books in print and online. Fortunately, there are a lot of sites in which one can learn arabic for free from the
comfort and privacy of the home, so all I need is a strong determination to be consistent and dedicated to achieving my goal, insha Allah. My new goal now is to be fluent in speaking arabic in a year from now, I don't want to look back then and ask myself why I still cant speak arabic after 8 years in saudi Arabia. I have decided to put links to the madina arabic books on this post and to update with any other links of good sites I discover, so as to motivate me and any other sister who has goals similar to mine, insha Allah. I pray Allah makes it easy and possible for me to see my dream come true and to be able to benefit others with it.

http://www.lqtoronto.com/audio.html

http://www.lqtoronto.com/madinasolutions.html