In polygyny, at least one person would be miserable

I just got off the phone calling my parents and siblings at home to wish them eid mubarak because I could not do it yesterday. So I called my mum first and she was very happy to hear from me and she told me she had a really nice and memorable eid, maa sha Allah. At home with her is my sister, her(my mum's) first child along with her husband and their children, They drove for 3 hours from their town to be able to visit her and celebrate eid with her. She also told me that my uncle and his new wife (he was divorced) was with her. Then she had my other neices and nephew who also went to celebrate with her on eid day and returned to their house in the evening since they live in the same town. So, maa sha Allah, she had so many loved ones around her and I did not ask about my dad, because I did not want to throw her in a bad mood because each eid day that I call and he was not there to celebrate with her, because he was with his other wife, she sounds so sad and depressed and complains (a little too much) about his absence. I just assumed she was okay this eid because she had so many loved ones around her that she did not miss her husband, my dad.

After her, I called my sisters, my brother and some friends, then I called my dad, a number of times. He did not pick his phone. I waited for some minutes and called again but he did not pick. I normally call him every eid day to say eid mubarak and have him make du'a for me and my kids. Since he did not pick my calls, I decided to call his wife with whom he lives in another town, to ask of him. After greeting her and asking about my step brothers and sisters, I told her I had been calling my Dad's phone for some time and he did not anwer, that can she please give him the phone? She was like no, he is not with her, he is with my mom, and he had been there since yesterday. So she had eid alone with her children. I said okay, I did not know, I thought he was with her because when I called my mum she did not tell me he was around. We had a brief talk about her children and their schooling and I hung up, feeling really sorry for her. I mean, on eid day every one wants to celebrate with their loved ones, and most women would want to be with their husband and they would want the kids, the dad everyone to eat together, as a family, but there she was, alone with her kids. Her husband was with his first wife, in another town.

So, basically, its either my dad spends eid with her, and my mom will be miserable and calling all her children to complain about it, (which I find annoying sometimes, because I think she needs to stop acting like they just got married when they have been married for 44 years.) or she goes down to celebrate with my mum and leave his second wife and her children to have eid by themselves. So whichever way, someone has got to be alone.

I know not all polygynous situations are like this as some men make their wives live together in the same house ( and I personally DO NOT like this) so that they don't have to go from one house to another, but it is not feasible in my parent's situation beause my dad was working in one town and my mum in another, and when they used to be together in the family house in my hometown for a few days for eid, they used to spend half the time quarreling about one thing or the other. So my dad had his second wife and their children living with him and goes to visit my mum every other week. Maybe if they were in the same town, it would be a little easier, then he can spend half the day in one house and the remaining half at the other. My dad is retired now, but it would still be very difficult to be equal in how he spends time with his wives, because of the distance, which is like an hour and my dad is getting close to seventy.

So I ended up feeling sorry for his second wife today and maybe the next eid, it would be my mom's turn to be alone.

And oh, I eventually got my dad on the phone, and I told him I had called his second wife when he did not pick his phone as I did not know he was with my mom when I called her earlier. He was quick to tell me that he was there with my mom, and I could tell that he was hoping I would be impressed by that...