Saying bye to tinnitus

Hello dear blog. Here I am again writing after a period of break. I had been busy with school and kids so I could not write most of what I needed to. 

Well, I have never mentioned on this blog that I have tinnitus; an annoying ringing of the ears which is only best understood by anyone who has had it. It started 5 years ago, when I was pregnant with my 3rd baby. I did not know what it was and did not do anything about it for some months. Then I thought of making a search on the net only to find out there is a name for it and that many people suffer from the condition. The worst news is that it is said to not have a cure and that poeple just have to learn to live with it. I went to some home remedy sites and found some suggested remedies which did not work. I made an appointment with an ENT even though most people say ENTs have no clue about how to treat it. Well, the look on the doctor's face was very depressing as he gave me some drugs to take for 2 months and then return to him. It was as if he knew the drug is not likely to help. It happened that I was nursing my baby at that time and he was just 4 months old so i decided to search online as I always do before taking any medication. It was said that the drug is not safe while nursing or pregnant. I went back to the doctor days later and he assured me that there is no problem and that I can take it. I searched again  and some people said the med- called Vastarel can actually cause ear ringing. Knowing how debilitating the tinnitus can be, I was afraid that taking the drug while nursing has a risk of my baby developing tinnitus in future, and I do not even wish this ringing on an enemy, I decided not to take chances, so I did not take the medicine. I kept trying to cope with it. I tried masking the noise with the AC or the kitchen exhaust fan. Most of the time don't remember I have tinnitus as long as there is an AC or a fan on but the problem starts when I go to other people's houses and they don't want the AC on because their kids have a cold. I have to block my left hear with my palm just to stop hearing the noise. At times my ear hurts and I just try to live with it.

Recently, I found out that the reason a small scar on my body gets darker each time I try to lighten it is because I have melasma. I went to see a dermatologist who gave me some bleaching creams that contain 4% hydroquinone. I used it for some weeks and did not notice a difference. I used some other rermedies like castor oil, baking soda, shea butter but the scar did not lighten. Later a friend gave me a cream that worked to lighten the spot. I was happy to have found something that works at last. I use sunscreen on it so that it does not darken again but to my surprise it became even darker than it was before the cream in only a week. So I resolved to never use anything on it again. I went to my dear site www.earthclinic.com for advice. Most people there who have had success with getting rid of their melasma said they treated it from the inside. I decided to go that route. The 2 most recommended supplemnts were Grape seed extract and grapefruit seed extract. I could not find the latter where I live so I decided to give Grape seed extract a shot to see if it would work. I bought a bottle from GNC and started taking 500mg a day just 3 days ago. And the first thing I noticed is that my ear ringing stopped!!!. Anyone who has never had tinnitus would not know what it means to be able to sit in a quiet room without hearing some ringing sound from inside your own head. Yesterday was the first time I slept throughout the night without the help of noise from an AC or a fan. I really could not believe it. I was trying to treat melasma with GSE but it took away my tinnitus. I really pray this lasts forever! I am doing more research on GSE to understand the correlation. I read on dr Lam's (www.drlam.com) site that it should be taken for 12 weeks to treat some other condition. I don't know if it can be taken long term, but if it is safe, I would be ready to take it for the rest of my life. Also, I would share my experience on as many websites as possible to help other tinnitus sufferers. It is disheartening to see how many people are being scammed by the numerous online books that claim to cure or treat tinnitus. I always search for the reviews by independent sites and always find that it is a scam. If you read about this and know anyone that has tinnitus, please advice them to try GSE, who knows, it may just be what they need to have silence in their heads again.

Low blood pressure , obesity and Anaemia

I made a post about my unexplained tiredness after eating sometime ago which I later found out it was due to low blood pressure. As I mentioned in that post, the doctor said its not a disease, just a condition and I just need to make some adjustment to my eating and other regimen to be okay.
   I  decided I would try to lose weight and see if my condition would improve. I have gained about 20kg in 9 years, between the time I was pregnant with my first child and now. I have tried different approach in the past without success. I have a problem staying on a particular diet programme for a long time. I start getting impatient if I don't see results within days...
    Around 3 months ago, I decided to try the popular low carb diet; Atkins. I lost 10 pounds before the end of the 2 week induction. I felt so happy because I had never lost 10 pounds in such a short period of time in the past. I however had to stop after 3 weeks for health reasons. I have been told I had low haemoglobin few months back and was taking Iron supplements. One of the rules of Atkins is not to take any iron supplements, not even the ones added to multivitamin pills. So I figured if my low blood pressure was (partly) due to my being anaemic, staying on a diet that forbids me from taking my iron supplements may make my low B.P. worse. Well, I started eating carbs again after 23 days of clean low carb eating, and of course, my weight crept up again. I went back to the doctor and got another prescription of Iron supplement and started taking it again. For the low blood pressure, the only thing that has worked is drinking a glass of water before my first meal  and if i have not eaten for many hours during the day,  I also drink water before eating. I may try Atkins again in future when I am no longer Anaemic. But for now, I have to find an alternative way of losing weight.

Ola, my love.

Today is 13th dhul-hijjah in the hijri calendar. And it is a day my son has waited to come for weeks. He has asked me like countless times what day it was and how many days left before it would be 13th dhul-hijjah. This is because he knew on this day, he would be a whopping 6 year old and he thought that would make him a really big boy and he would be able to tell his friends that he is no longer 5, 5 and a half but 6, maa sha Allah.  The day however, holds very deeper memories for me and always have me holding back the tears, tears of joy and thankfulness each and every time I remember that day...                                                            I was pregnant with my second child, and we just had our eid party 2 days before. I had my first baby exactly 1week before my EDD and was already getting impatient when the second one was still chilling out in my womb a day before the EDD and I was all big and swollen. So when I woke up on the 12th dhul-hihhah of that year, with labour pains, I was really excited I was going to see the lil man in a few hours at last. This is because my first baby was born after about 8 hours of labour. So, with my previous experience, I knew it may take a few hours after the onset of labour before the baby would be born and did not want to be at the hospital for too long, I decided to spend some time cleaning my house and even took a walk before asking my Hb to take me to the hospital. We got there around noon and the pain was not yet bad at that time. I was checked by a doctor who said I should go back home because I was just 2 cm dilated and there was no point putting me on admission. I was reluctant to go back home because the hospital we chose was a 30 minute drive from where we lived then but I had to go. I spend the next few hours walking and taking a break when the contractions start, hoping this will help shorten he length of the labour. Around 10 in the evening, I felt the contractions were lasting longer and were fewer apart and I was getting weak because I could not make myself eat or drink anything, so I told The man to take mt back to the hospital. He did not think it was time yet and said we should wait a while longer because he did not want to have to take me back home a second time. Well, I insisted I had to go because I was really in pain and when he saw how serious I was, he picked up my 2 yr old and off we went to the hospital. By the time e got there, I could barely walk and I was so sure I would soon have my baby, but I was so wrong. I got checked again and was told I was still 2cm dilated and I have to go back home. I refused. I told the doctor I had a baby before and there has to be an explanation for this pain I was having and why would I not dilate more for many hours despite having close contraction that were painful. So, the doctor called on another doctor who is more experienced thnt her who examined me and found out there was a problem. I was quickly sent upstairs to the delivery room and it was on the way there that I heard a nurse telling another that I had abruptio placenta. They probably assumed I would not know what it meant. Thankfully, I am one who reads a lot and had read almost every book around about prregnancies and the complications that could occur before or during confinement that I was really scared when I heard that from the nurse. I started crying. The thought of losing my son after 9 months of difficulty; nausea, throwing up, heartburns to mention a few was just unbearable. I was making all the dua I know, beggeing Allah to save my baby. I was strapped to the fetal heart monitor and was given the oxygen mask and a nurse was left with me to monitor the baby and to call on the doctor in case she notice the baby was in distress so that I could be taken to the theatre for CS and all the while I was just weeping and praying and the fear of losing my baby masked all the pain such that I could not even remember labour pain any more. All I could think of was having a life, healthy baby. I was there for some hours and the labour did not progress until the doctor decided to break the water sac at around 3.00a.m. All that while, I could not even get in touch with my Hb who was sent home around midnight and was made to take my phone because I was not supposed to have any phone, money, jewelry or any other valuable with me...                                                                                                                           I eventually had the baby at 7.15 a.m, 26 hours after the onset of labour and I was so happy to hear his screams and found out he was perfectly ok, maa sha Allah tabaarakAllah and when I held him, I was filled with awe. The thought that just a small mistake could have made all the difference and the story would have had another end? Suppose I had agreed to return home when the young doctor checked me the second time, would I have had this cute 6 year old first grader today? I have a cold shiver just thinking of all the mums that have lost their babies because of a simple slip by the doctor, the nurse or even the mother herself. I really really thank my Lord for turning my tears into laughter and for blessing me with even more healthy loving kids after my dear sweet Ola was born six years ago. This is Ola's birth story. I would make out time to write the others' some day, as they all enjoy listening to their birth stories.

Divorce For No Reason?

Marriage is sacred and its not something to play with. I know if any normal moderately reasonable person were asked if its okay to divorce a spouse without any reason at all, their first reaction would be of course not! But hey, I have been on a site before where a brother was trying to prove to everyone else that requiring a valid reason for a divorce applies only to women and that a man could divorce a good, pious, beautiful, obedient wife for no other reason than he just wants to do so, and there would be no sin on him, and his evidence was that a sahabah did the same. Well, I was somehow disturbed that a supposedly pious muslim brother could be peddling that view on a public forum and I tried to reason with him that even the prophet SAW did not divorce any of his wives and he told men in his farewell pilgrimage speech to fear Allah and be good to women etc, but he insisted that there is no evidence that a man needs a reason at all to divorce a wife no matter how good she is. I came across this fatwa from a reputable scholar and posted it on the site for him to see and more importantly so that other muslim men without knowledge would not be misled by his "view". I decided to share it here too because how much i hate divorce...

Divorce For No Reason?
Author: Al ‘Allaamah Shaikh Zayd ibn Muhammad al-Madkhalee (hafithahullah)

Translator: Abu Fouzaan Qaasim
❁❁❁
Q: Does the husband incur sin if he divorces his wife for no reason?
A: The reason behind him divorcing her must be looked into. If he has a valid
excuse for why he divorced her, then there is no problem (in him doing so).
However, if he mistreated her and divorced her for no reason whatsoever, she doesn't
have any (outstanding) flaws in her manners or physical makeup or any offense
transpired on her behalf, then there is no doubt that he sins. This is because he
treated her wrongly and perhaps she has no family hence becoming a victim of
poverty and destitution. So it is upon the men to fear Allaah.
The marital life of the believing men and women is connected (i.e. between them in
this worldly life and the next). The wife of a slave in this world will be his wife in
Paradise in the highest degree of beauty and perfection, superior to the hoorul- 'eeyn
due to her prayers, fasting and belief in Allaah.
So it is upon the Muslim to be very diligent (upon holding onto his wife) if Allaah
facilitates for him a woman from amongst the people of Tawheed, prayer and fasting.

__________________________________________________________________
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And if certain things occur from her of crookedness or mistakes, then he corrects
them to the best of his ability. (And know!) that there isn't any person except that they
have faults and are prone to make mistakes. However sticking to and applying
patience is (from) the mannerisms of the Mu'mineen..... na'am.
Q: What about the statement of The Most High:




“But if you intend to replace a wife with another...” [4:20]?
A: Na'am, if he wants to, however, because of a reason. It isn't intended for the
man to change (i.e. divorce) his wife who he has taken care of and lived with for
sometime except because of a reason that forces him to divorce (her). (If this is the
case) then there is nothing wrong with letting her go.
❁❁

POINTS ON HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE

Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

3. Don't over do; keep your limits

4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does

5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip

6. Dream more while you are awake

7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..

8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind (your partner) others of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.

9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.

10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present

11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you

12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like
algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

13. Smile and laugh more

14. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:

15. Call your family often

16. Each day give something good to others

17. Forgive everyone for everything

18. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6

19. Try to make at least three people smile each day

20. What other people think of you is none of your business

21. Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will Stay in touch.

Life:

*****As Muslims we say Allaah


22. Put (GOD) Allaah first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.

23. GOD heals everything

24. Do the right things

25. However good or bad a situation is, it will change

26. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up

27. The best is yet to come

28. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful

29. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it

30. If you know GOD you will always be happy. So, be happy.



ENJOY LIFE WHILE YOU ARE ALIVE ........

**article written by an unknown author**

SECRET CODE; MY REASON

I made a post about not expecting any good from a husband to avoid/minimize being hurt. I know that some men would read that statement and think its BS, and maybe some women who are blessed with good husbands would wonder why anyone would even say this, but here is what led to that line of thought...

Madam A was happily married for 40 years.

The marriage was blessed with 6 kids, all grown and married.

Madam A's husband decided to marry young girl, the age of his last child.

Madam A was not happy about it because she did not expect it to happen at that time since they were both in their sixties and did not have any problems, but she is a Muslim and she knows its his right so she accepted it and life went on.

Madam A's husband and the second wife were living in another town not very far from madam A, but she still gets to see her husband every now and then.

One day (after 5 years) Madam A's husband shows up at madam A's house with his little kids he had with the second wife and announced to madam A that he had divorced the second wife and that she (madam A) would have to help him raise the kids.

Again, madam A was not happy to raise another woman's kids especially at that stage of her life when she just wanted to relax and enjoy her retirement, visiting her kids and grand-kids when she wants, but she accepted nonetheless, not wanting to disobey her husband.

And, guess what? I mean guess what?! Few weeks later, she found out that her husband did not divorce his second wife and that they were still living together in the same house as husband and wife, only without their little kids who were brought for her to raise under the guise of their mum being divorced. Now isn't that just so convenient? gotta love these husbands...

Well, madam A and her kids had had enough! they figured out their dad did that because it was his house, so he felt he had a right to leave his kids there and he can have a peaceful life with his second wife without being disturbed by the lil ones. So one of madam A's sons moved his mum into his house to live with him, so that their good dad could have his dear little house all to himself and he can move whoever he wants into it...

Explanation of Imaam an-Nawawi’s Forty Hadeeth

Explanation of Imaam an-Nawawi’s Forty Hadeeth